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ladygt:

Déjà vu.

wait is this from the actual movie or no…

(via saquake)

Source: ladygt
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budpest:

REBLOG PLEASE

They think she might be in the West London area so spread the word out to Ealing/Kew/Richmond/Brentford etc

She’s only 14 years old and has health concerns and is thought to be ‘very vulnerable’

omg!!! tht poor gurl!!!!! And she’s only 14!? come on people reblog this the ore tht ppl see this the better chance tht maybe someone has seen her

(via natsuhiuchiha)

Source: budpest
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sherlockfellwithcastiel:

zyzil:

princess-azula:

grapefruitshampoo:

imnotthereasonthatyoureinsane:

tephnos:

sirisles:

dixiesaurer:

aaronwarner-anderson:

mongezeas:

g0kudera:

sarahdesdemona:

ninth-level-of-awesome:

I love how Tumblr teaches us how to be perfect criminals.

Also, if you’re burying a full body, make sure you bury them vertically. Satellites orbiting earth look for holes that are approx. 6ft long because that’s suspicious. Ideally though, drain your body of fluids in a tub ((mix fluids with bleach and let them soak before draining and take precautions to keep your house from smelling like death from your sink and whatnot. Draining the body also keeps decomp at bay a bit and makes it easier to portion)) and cut it to bits. It’s easier to bury a head than a whole body, and takes less time so you don’t have to tell your neighbors, “Oh, I’m night gardening!”

Also, if a dog happens across it, it’s more likely it will devour a single body part than all of your ex-husband.

Another method is to put it into a septic tank. They’re a plethora of bacteria, and the smell of waste covers the smell of decomposition very well.



You should also destroy all teeth, massacre the face and burn fingerprints/remove finger tips to keep from identifying by anything other than DNA.

…I didn’t come up with these ideas, just what I’ve gleaned from reading on the internet.

i used to joke about Tumblr teaching us how to get away with murder, but fuck, man

the thing is when i see this i want to go kill a man just because i have the knowledge

thanks tumblr

Remember when you’re at the crime scene to wipe down all surfaces and then take the victims hands and touch things with them. Pick up cups and run the hands along table tops. A room with zero fingerprints is very suspicious.

If you live near the ocean you can drain the body and cut up the cadaver into small pieces then mix it all together with fish parts and dispose of it easily by pretending to chum the water for fish and sharks. Actually do chum the water a bit before dumping in your victim to be sure there are plenty of hungry fish around. Stick around and fish for a while so anyone who happens to see you won’t get suspicious. This way you don’t have any body parts lying around waiting to be dug up and identified. Plus you might catch a marlin or something.

PLUS YOU MIGHT CATCH A MARLIN

I AFDGFHGKJHKHGFDSF I AM DONE

Don’t forget that the chances of being caught are greatly reduced if you murder someone who has no connection to you at all. Most murderers end up killing someone they know in some fashion, so they’re easily caught. Serial killers kill at random, hence why they can kill a lot before they screw up.

I am not a serial killer, honest.

I am seriously concerned for all of you

please don’t judge me for tagging this for future reference, IT’S FOR PURELY FICTIONAL PURPOSES OK

I’M PRETTY SURE THE NEXT TIME I SEE THIS POST, ADVICE ON BURYING BODIES WILL ADD UP UNTIL IT SUFFICES TO BE COMPILED AS A HANDBOOK

How to kill a bitch: a guide by tumblr

One of the classes at my school is forensics and the final is to write an essay on how to commit the perfect murder.

I think I know what I’m doing next year.

looks like I know what I’ll be majoring in after med school

(via based-sasori)

Source: actualadvicemallard
Answer
  • Question: Have you looked up Saw Whet owls? They're tiny owls and they're adorable and pretty much look like a baby owl their whole life. - something-uncanny
  • Answer:

    thecutestofthecute:

    AWW

    YISSS

    awww their so cute i want one

Source: thecutestofthecute
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neoliberalismkills:

wilclcat:

victor-f-baby:

ectobiolosassy:

crazieecatladyy:

how to get the d

  • image

i think i don’t want it anymore

as a math person i will give the D to any girl that can solve this. 

as a girl ‘math person’ i will tell you that you can’t solve this as there are no x or y values as it is only a formula and not a question plus we wouldn’t want the d from you anyway

I’ve never seen someone so efficiently shut down in my entire fucking life

(via gaaraofsburbia)

Source: wilclcat
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truyorkbity:

AvaLynn was attacked by another student on the school playground. We are fighting for answers and for greater supervision at school.

My friend Lacey Harris’s 5 year old daughter was brutalized by another child on the playground at school this week, in Pascagoula, Mississippi. Her face is swollen and bruised beyond recognition, and the only thing the school can tell her is that they “are investigating”

This sweet little 5 year old girl is terrified to return to school. She is in pain and she has been MAIMED. This needs IMMEDIATE media attention. The school and local news are ignoring the mother’s and loved ones’ cries for help. This family needs justice for what has been done to their poor little angel, and not just to be swept under the rug, as the school district is attempting to do. PLEASE shine some light on this situation and force school administration and news media to get some answers!

The mother has started a GoFundMe page to request help for paying medical bills and legal fees, as it looks as though she’s going to have to pursue this route in order to get any justice at all for her little girl. Please, please, share this link on your page. Even if people are unable to donate, please just help us get the word out on what is going on with this poor family.

This is really heartbroken for me and extremely hard to look at.

This is the link to Ava’s donation page.
Please donate and share and PRAY!
God bless you all!

http://www.gofundme.com/doid6w

what the hell is this shit!!!! I cant believe little kids are now beating up on each other, that its turned into this!!!!! this is an innocent 5 year old and look at her she’s hurt and scared. If I were the mother I would sue the school for this and the other child or kids families as well. this is not right… this brings me to tears just looking at these pics.

Come on ppl spread the word donate! we need to do something!!!!!!!

(via lana-del-sei)

Source: truyorkbity
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Source: thecutestofthecute
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whyipreferhell:

vintage-freakshow:

Katherine Knight - the first Australian woman to be sentenced to life without parole. She stabbed her husband 37 times, then skinned him and hung his skin from the door frame of the living room. She cut off his head, put it in a soup pot, baked his buttocks, and prepared gravy and vegetables to go with the “roast”. She then set out a vindictive note and the meal for her kids but the police found it before her children. She is referred to as Australia’s Hanna Lector.

Haha “Hanna Lector”

Damn Bitch crazy…… But that’s really nasty what mother would allow her own kids to eat their own father, and not evening know it!!!!! she deserved the death plently

(via thegoodluckkitty)

Source: vintage-freakshow
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marriedtofiction:

what sex position is this called

69

(via harmonysama)

Source: marriedtofiction
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blackgirlsrpretty2:

emiliogorgeous:

incredible.

wow!!!!

NOW THAT RIGHT THERE IS WHAT i CALL AMAZING AND FUCKING INCREDIBLE. PPL AROUND THE WORLD ARE COMIN  TO FERGUSON, TO STOP ALL THIS MADDNESS

(via greatest-change)

Source: emiliogorgeous
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lanjenshi:

ask-demon-connie-springles:

scandalobsessedfan:

thankfulforanotherdawn:

the-absolute-best-posts:

michiamocristina:

An 87 Year Old College Student Named Rose

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn’t already know. 
I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned round to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me 
with a smile that lit up her entire being. 

She said, “Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I’m eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?”

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, “Of course you may!” and she gave me a giant squeeze. 

“Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?” I asked.

She jokingly replied, “I’m here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids…”

“No seriously,” I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

“I always dreamed of having a college education and now I’m getting one!” she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake.We became instant friends. Every day for the 
next three months, we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this “time machine” 
as she shared her wisdom and experience with me. 

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and 
she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up. 

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I’ll never forget what she taught us. She was 
introduced and stepped up to the podium.

As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor. Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, “I’m sorry I’m so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I’ll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell 
you what I know.”

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, “We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop 
playing. There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day. 

You’ve got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.
We have so many people walking around who are dead and don’t even know it!There is a huge difference between growing 
older and growing up.

If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don’t do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old.

If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight. 

Anybody can grow older. That doesn’t take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. 
Have no regrets.

The elderly usually don’t have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those 
with regrets.”

She concluded her speech by courageously singing “The Rose.”

She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.

At the year’s end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago. One week after graduation Rose died 
peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it’s 
never too late to be all you can possibly be .When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they’ll really enjoy it!

These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS 
OPTIONAL.

We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.

this is the best thing I have ever read in my life

This is truly inspirational

Bless that woman.

When I was in college, I had a classmate that was 60 years old, she is still my friend.

OUT OF EVERYTHING i HAVE EVER READ ON THIS SITE THIS IS THE MOST TOUCHING AND  REMARKABLE THING EVERY. i BLESS HER SOUL WHEREVER SHE IS IN HEAVEN

(via hinatasashybamf)

Source: michiamocristina
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mausspace:

weirdtrip:

he looks so pleased

"oh look. look at this apple. it me"

horf horf horf

Awww he’s smiling!!!

(via grenne-world)

Source: tkr
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thebassoonerthebetter:

lost-in-ikea:

glam00ur:

all 46 excuses on my friends wall, 

1. i was just really, really early for tomorrow

2. we can’t all be usain bolt

3. in this day and age, we shouldn’t need labels like “late”

4. i had pe first period do you blame me

5. i really, really didn’t want to sing

6. my brother thought it would be hilarious to drop me outside the prison gates

7. you can’t tell me how to live my life

8. #YOLO

9. my legs fell off and i had to roll all the way to the emergency clinic

10. there was a freak yachting accident

11. i am a fucking retard

12. this is just for my wall

13. do you even read these

14. “it does not matter how slow you go, so long as you do not stop

15. i spent my entire night writing tom daley fanfiction

16. my father left my mother for an air hostess seven years ago do you expect me to get over that emotional trauma overnight

17. sarah palin and i got into a twitter war and i couldn’t leave and let her win

18. traffic jammy jammy jam

19. how can i go to school when alex turner

20. my sim was having an emotional meltdown and i needed to be there for her

21. i was sticking it to the man

22. i spent my entire night worrying if i would ever lose my virginity 

23. fifty shades of late; i was walking and then i caught the eye of an attractive member of the opposite sex and we began exchanging significant looks and i knew we would one day make sweet love so i just walked alongside him and tried to catch his eye and to be continued

24. part two he was playing hard to get so we walked and walked and he had the perfect hair colour it was sort of beige brown anyway it turned out he was walking to a bus stop so obviously i had to catch the bus because true love and silently we rode out to papakura and into the sunset

25. my meth lab caught fire

26. my bed is more comfortable than your school will ever be

27. i was sad

28. it was a nice day, so i walked leisurely

29. i had beat my younger brother for saying “swag”

30. i had to travel back to the 1950’s to ensure my birth

31. 2 kool 4 scool

32. i had to stop, collaborate and listen

33. i tried

34. i’m sorry i’m late

      it’s not my fault

      my auntie was killed

      and i joined a cult

35. a haiku about lateness:

late late late late late

late late late late late late late

 late late late late late

36. my best friend was telling me how to give a satisfactory blow job i wish i was joking

37. i was fashionably late

38. i was caught in a flash mob true story omfg

39. i did not choose the late life, the late life chose me

40. do

41. you

42. even

43. read

44. these

45. i was fighting al qaeda

46. traffic

YESSSS IT’S ON MY DASHBOARD AGAIN

the post that doesn’t age

ITS BACK

OMG #36!!!

(via a-schediaphiliac)

Source: artvevo
Photo Set

how come the liver is worth more that the heart?

(via silver-me-timbers)

Source: interquast